The 09th September 2017!

It’s not strange 
I know how it works

The universe works in its own way

You will be where you are meant to be 

You will be removed from where you are not meant to be

You will be where you are needed

As a light worker 

You will always be where you are needed 

And you will be removed where your work is done

It doesn’t always feel nice

It is not always nice not being in control 

Today however 

Today was

I dithered

Tube or train

I dithered 

Now or the next one

Eventually I made the move

Always rushing

Always consumed by rushing

Always consumed!!!!!

And there she was

I get on the tube 

I had stepped on the carriage before her one and got off 

Because this was obviously where I was meant to be

I had a plan of where I would be getting off

Where I should be getting off

But there she was 

She looked so small in the little seat

She was sobbing and her mascara was smeared all over her face

Her tissue looked incompetent and dirty

People can be so British 

They just sit and stare

I was born here but my orgins make that behaviour foreign to me!

I didn’t ask if she was ok

Clearly she wasn’t

I took her hand 

She looked up and smiled

I said

Amazing how no one can see you isn’t it!

I said

I see you!!!

Maybe you need to hear that today

I see you!!

I said

Is funny

You could be me

You are me

This was me just a few days ago

Except I was at a bus stop and I don’t wear make up so no mascara to evidence the turmoil

I said

It’s hard 

I see you

I said

I couldn’t help it

The other day

On any of the days that you have been me

The other day 

I sobbed

It came from nowhere

I cried for Janice 

She died

She is dead

She was 48

I’m 40

I cried for my spirit that is slowly slipping away from me

I cried for the loss of him

He is alive 

But he has left

He just left 

And now he has to be dead to me

That’s kind of worse….

I said 

I cried for the loss of my strength 

I cried because the strength of the pain is sometimes to strong to be muzzled!

No one said a word to me 

I said

They just looked on all British like

So 

I see you I said

She didn’t let go of my hand

You will be ok 

I said

You will

Trust me

I know things 

I wouldn’t be here if you wasn’t meant to know that you will be ok!

She sobbed more

I held onto her hand

I missed several stops

I didn’t even ask her name

It didn’t seem to matter

She was me and I was her so it didn’t seem to matter

I reached into my bag and as I offered her a wet wipe the other one us that had got on and immediately sat on her other side, simultaneously offered a pink petal from a flower

There are no accidents

Who walks around with pink petals in brown hand bags!

She smiled then

She tried to say thank you through the tears 

As I got up to get off I gave her a hug

She held on so tight

I whispered that she will be ok

It will be ok

You are seen 

You are Loved

You are needed 

You will be ok

You will get through this feeling

Maybe not gracefully 

But you will get through it

You are me so if I can you can do the same 

She held on tight

I feel lighter now

Maybe I needed her as much she never knew that she would receive me!

Just when I think I’m empty

I am reminded that I am Love and Love is me!

I cannot be depleted!

I will always be where I am meant to be!

©21/02/17 
All Rights Reserved

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Scratched- (your) Name (is on) That Tune

There are so many lyrics So many melodies and harmonies that sing …. of you.

It seems like just yesterday that I loved you till the end of time! 

That I wanted to dance with you outside in the rain!

That you were my Love song, one of them at least!

That I wanted to rock you eternally!

I thought that I would love you endlessly

It seems like just yesterday that I thought that Love had found its way to me!
I had thought that we would be Lovers!

But 

These tables keep turning

And 

Now the harmonies and melodies sing..

Who the fuck do you think I is?

You really Don’t Know Bout My Crew

Press Triggah We No Press People Button

Bwoy no put yuh hat weh yuh cyaan reach it!

Pussy 

This is a warning warning warning!

The Love songs have got dark because of you!

There are so many lyrics 

So many melodies and harmonies that sing …. of you.

You are not who I can run to when I need love or to fill this empty space with laughter!

You no longer bring me joy

And

Now

After all of this time

After all of these times!

I am weary

All that time spent preparing!

You are clearly not who I should be preparing for

But 

You really did feel like the sweetest thing that I have known

And

As I write the tears are rolling rolling rolling 

And

I feel like I just died

But

I am not liking this ghetto romance

I can no longer stomach this Emotional Roller Coaster- Loving you was never good for Me

You have had me chasing Fools Gold!!

I have to check out of this heartbreak hotel 

But

I can’t get you out of my mind!

And

I still want to give you caramel kisses

No she, can love you like I do! 

It’s amazing that even after all of the all of it

A small part of me still hears the melodies singing…..

Don’t Go!!!

Please stay

I need you here with me!

There are so many lyrics 

So many melodies and harmonies that sing …. of you.

How could you break my heart! – (we went through it all together! You let me down!)

How could you not see past the heaven in my eyes!

You have taken my happy feelings 

We are no longer one!

I’ve got so much things to say right now!

But 

I won’t 

I’ve got to find peace of mind!
In the future you will now want my love 

And

I will sing that you must be out of your fucking mind!

Your Love will always be hustle

And

Although I will always love you

I have no more time for your silly games

You are living in a fools paradise

You can’t be a Man about it!

You can’t see me!

I am Magnificent 

My love is and will always be King!

There are so many lyrics 

So many melodies and harmonies that sing …. of you.

But

You can’t keep this Good Woman Down

You can not negate my Greatness!

I will not Retograde!

I will remember that I am 20ft Tall

I will receive More in Time

Jah Chariot a roll an it nah leave me behind!

© KLove 2017

All Rights Reserved

#writer #femalenonpoet #biographicwritting #poetry #selflove #selfhealing #artist #feminism #blacklove #mindfulness #buildingwomen#buildingus#lovingmentoo#kloveismbrand #kloveism#klovesU

That Dream

That DreamThat dream was intense

My skin is clammy

That dream was immensely graphic 

I’m almost emabarrased to write it

Is it really possible to do that?

Can legs separate that far apart?

Can one a person climax so many more times than once

The thickness was so long

Is that possible?

The potential runs deep

Woke up feeling stretched out with absent heels on my feet!

Wrist feeling like memories of being held hostage!

The body feels tenderised!

That dream was a lot 

In that dream so were we!

© KLove 2017

All Rights Reserved

#writer #femalenonpoet #biographicwritting #poetry #selflove #selfhealing #artist #feminism #blacklove #mindfulness #buildingwomen#buildingus#lovingmentoo#kloveismbrand #kloveism#klovesU

Stamp It Out!

Done good

Buy new trainers!

Amazing news and crippling news almost simultaneously

Buy new trainers!

Feel sad

Buy new trainers!

Feel betrayed

Buy new trainers!

Feel proud of yourself 

Buy new trainers!

Should be angry but not

Buy new trainers!

Disappointed

Buy new trainers!

Crushed,heartbroken (again), so stupid 

Buy new trainers

Still feel love 

Buy new trainers!

Achieved a massive achievement

Buy new trainers!

Wondering why not you

Buy new trainers!

Maybe because you are not a girly girl

Buy new (Jamaican swear word of your choice) trainers!

Not wearing a friggin dresses and converse (no offence, just not me)

Buy new trainers!

Not wearing dresses if I don’t have to infact

Buy new trainers!

I am Me

Buy new trainers!

Made to feel less

Buy new trainers!

Know that you are actually so much more than ready for

Buy new trainers!

Heart is happy

Buy new trainers!

Feel grateful 

Buy new trainers!

Heart is broken again

Buy new trainers!

Pictures and words going around and around in my head

Buy new trainers!

Not reacting

Buy new trainers!

Not rising to it

Buy new trainers!

Janckro,Crassis, 

Buy new trainers!

New chapter

Buy new trainers!

Walking into new light

In newly bought trainers!

Waking away from darkness

In newly bought trainers!

Forgiving, Forgetting, Being, Still Loving, Goddess stepping

In newly bought trainers!

Unbreakable, trusting the process 

In newly bought trainers!

I’m Buying new trainers!
© KLove 2017

All Rights Reserved

#writer #femalenonpoet #biographicwritting #poetry #selflove #selfhealing #artist #feminism #blacklove #mindfulness #buildingwomen#buildingus#lovingmentoo#kloveismbrand #kloveism#klovesU

Whistles in the Wind

My energy…..you sucked on it like a long never ending cigarette!

You seemed to crave it in the same way.

Except my energy, despite its satisfying addictiveness, is not toxic

You wasted so much of it!

You ought to have ingested it

Instead You chose to blow it away

What a waste!
© KLove 2017

All Rights Reserved

#writer #femalenonpoet #biographicwritting #poetry #selflove #selfhealing #artist #feminism #blacklove #mindfulness #buildingwomen#buildingus#lovingmentoo#kloveismbrand #kloveism#klovesU

It Will Take A While

When I’m like this it’s funny how i can be so scared but like the feeling
When I’m like this I am scared of the fast pace of my heart

But I like being able to feel the pace because I can feel that it is still beating!

When I’m like this I am scared of what I know is coming, however I welcome it at the same time because I know what comes with it is a release!

When I’m like this I don’t like it, however I know that it is my body clearing the blockage!

When I’m like this I normally count, forwards and backwards to disconnect my power from it, however today I’m not counting, I am not seeking the disconnect, I am holding on to the dizziness and I am rebelling against the/any/my weakness!

Its funny that today is the 1st time that I have noticed that when I am like this I don’t think!

It’s funny that when I am like this I don’t think, yet when I am like this it is because I have been overthinking!

Overthinking and over feeling and over controlling, yet when I am like this I am generally not in control!

Anxiety is an outward display of the contradictions within!

It’s funny how when I am like this I am numb, yet I can feel every feeling, I can hear every sound and despite how slow it all seems, I can see everything in high definition like clarity!

Some times Anxiety is an expression, a response to the entrenched and undeserved sadness and the unrequited love that the Love seeks!

Sometimes Anxiety just is.

It’s funny how despite the internal chaos that the feelings bring, the surrender to it brings with it feelings of peace!

Anxiety is like a looking glass facing in!

© KLove 2017

All Rights Reserved

#writer #femalenonpoet #biographicwritting #poetry #selflove #selfhealing #artist #feminism #blacklove #mindfulness #buildingwomen#buildingus#lovingmentoo#kloveismbrand #kloveism#klovesU

Who don’t hear must feel!

He isn’t coming back And he shouldn’t 
He ought not 

He should not have ever looked my way

He should never have spoken to me 

He should not have used his voice to hypnotise me

I ought never have listened

I should have covered both ears 

I should have closed my eyes, all 3

I should have sage’d and sea salted him out of my heart and my memories 

But….

How could I have rid him when he has always been there

When he has been shadowing me

When our paths were destined to cross, eventually

From mutual friends to localities 

Our meeting was always destined

He ought not have pursued it

He, of Him, knowing himself and karmically knowing me, should have used his powers for as opposed to on me

He isn’t coming back this time

I don’t think

I’m not sure

He ought not

But that hasn’t stopped him before

It hasn’t stopped me from welcoming him either

I don’t want him to come back

I don’t want to settle 

For what 

I said no comprising on anything 

For what

I need more

I need better 

I should have it

Why not

I don’t want him to come back

But…. I didn’t want him to leave either 

© KLove 2017

All Rights Reserved

#writer #femalenonpoet #biographicwritting #poetry #selflove #selfhealing #artist #feminism #blacklove #mindfulness #buildingwomen#buildingus#lovingmentoo#kloveismbrand #kloveism#klovesU