Mood Rings 5: Weakness

I still check my phone for you Every morning 

I check for that once in a while made me smile all day though good morning text

Every so often throughout the day for that random Hi K….a, made my entire day though message 

Every end of the work day, journey home, should be resting in the evening, and several times before sleeping and hoping that I won’t dream about you whilst wanting to because I can just about still remember your face and the bass in your voice and the dreams are now the only time that I see and hear you!

My heart is miserable 

My heart is missing you

My mind less so, it is as usual in conflict with my heart

My mind as usual is addressing the elephant in our room

My mind is asking what in the actual fuck is that you are missing?

My mind is stating that this romanticised version of you is entirely made up!

My mind is reminding my heart of all the times you gave -0 fucks, every time you said words that left it immobile, beatless!

My mind reminds the heart of all of the cold words, of all of the (intentional or not) mind fucks that left it defunct 

My mind is as usual pissed off that the heart will not (Wo)man the fuck up!

My mind reminds the heart that it warned it not fuck with you again because each and every time it has it has only gotten fucked! (and if not in the pleasurable way there isn’t really a benefit so what is the point)

My mind is annoyed because it knows that My heart isn’t listening- it never does when it comes to you!

My mind knows that it cannot compete with the Love that is being carried for you!

I still check my phone for you!

I still wait for it to communicate you with me!

My heart is miserable 

My heart is missing you

My mind is pissed

Both can not wait for you and this moment to become historic!
© KLove 2017

All Rights Reserved

#writer #femalenonpoet #biographicwritting #poetry #selflove #selfhealing #artist #feminism #blacklove #mindfulness #buildingwomen#buildingus#lovingmentoo#kloveismbrand #kloveism#klovesU

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