Good or Bad

I want to say that I miss you.
It might just be old feelings latching onto or caught up in this new but stressful day.
But I want to say that I feel this way still nearly every second of everyday and that you are still also in nearly every dream every night.
I want to say that when I think of you now, it is a little more colourless, and your smell is less pungent, and my thoughts are bittersweet because whilst I still miss you, doing so hurts so much.
I still can’t breathe sometimes.
I still cry most of the time.
I want to say that I miss your smile, your walk, your touch, your voice, and the Eastern language that I could never really understand, so I would just smile and say ” yeah” and “ok”
Lol.
I want to say that you probably knew this, but you just let me be.
I want to say that I miss the times when to me,you were simply you and to you I was simply me…..because now… to each other…..we are simply nothing.
I want to say that today I realised that I have not seen you for real since o12.
But I would still recognise your colour, and your then energy, and scent.
I would hear your music in riot!
I want to say that I am scared that it is getting easier to dispel thoughts of you.
I want to say that I am scared that if I allow myself to forget you completely, a lot of my words will be also be gone.
Because good or bad, love or disappointment,reciprocation or not, pain or sadness, confused or uncertain, pink or grey, or black even…..you give me words! You light this love that often melts onto these pages.

I want to say that I miss you.
It might just be old feelings latching onto or caught up in this new but stressful day.

But I want to say that I miss you.
Because the truth is, I do.

I want to say that I miss you.

© KLove 2014

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4 thoughts on “Good or Bad

    • Hi
      I write biographically. Be it experiences, thoughts, feelings.
      No I haven’t seen him since June 2012.
      Thanks for reading!
      Big Love
      Xxxmwaaahhxx

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